Space

4.6.18


Space.


We all need our own space.


“Take care of your thoughts when you are alone, and take care of your words when you are with people.”


Now, I'm the kind of girl that loves surrounding herself with people. I just love it (as of late anyway). I love spending time with friends, heading into town and seeing the world pass by. Even when I'm alone, sitting in coffee shops, people watching, as I work, is one of my favorite pass times.




In the past, I was definitely more of an introvert. I spent a lot of time alone. I gave myself a lot of space.


At that time, going out was not my thing. I lived a very 'ordered’ and 'structured’ life.


I woke up to the same alarm, ate at the same times and did very similar things from day to day.


It was my obsessive behavior that isolated me. But, the behavior was what I loved at that time, so it's understandable.



TOP - H&M // BELT - ASOS

Nowadays things are very different.


I love the randomness of my life. I love that each day brings something new and I love my freedom.


With that, I also love that fact that I see people more. I adore my friends, and having them as a constant in my life is SO important to me. The same goes for my family, as much as they think I constantly want to escape them, knowing that they are always there for me, even when I'm being 'hormonal hol’, makes me feel so loved and complete. (Excuse me whilst I vomit over my own gushing haha)




The only thing with that though is that, I no longer give myself time alone. I no longer have those days to myself where I just do 'me’ and get on with work.


I just got out of my first relationship, and honestly that's something that has broken me a lot more than I thought it ever would, so fair enough that I need to surround myself with people who will lift me up again. But, I think I also need to learn to lift myself up alone too. I need to take care of myself - give myself the space to think and reflect.


My brain is intense - I feel intensely - so time alone, for me to deal with all these feelings right now, is pretty crucial.




So, I'm starting to give myself space again.


I'm taking a tiny leaf out of my old book and spending some time isolated with my thoughts and my work again.


I'm learning to look after myself, working out, taking mental health days. I'm making to-do lists, having long showers, listening to Lily Allen and eating my favorite foods. I'm writing, I'm filming, I'm photographing. I'm doing things I love.


I want to love my life - I want to love what I do - and sometimes I think that means taking time and space to yourself to figure out just how to do that.

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