I think we can all agree that life right now is feeling, well, a little all over the place. Every morning I'm waking up to a different emotion, different level of motivation and different outlook, and whilst it's giving me an uneasy feeling a lot of the time, I'm slowly, but surely, getting there and finding my balance dealing with this whole thing.

I guess my life before this felt a little bit 'off-balance' anyway. I felt that I was really struggling to find my feet creatively, and I'd lost a big chunk of my love for writing, which felt incredibly unusual. But, weirdly, I'm finding this time at home to be doing me some good in that respect. Each day the sun seems to keep shining and I spot another bit of day-to-day life that inspires me to shoot or say something. I'm taking the time to figure out what I enjoy creating, what images I enjoy looking at and what kind of thing I want to share with my writing. I feel like a weight is slowly being lifted.

Anyway, regardless of my creative-self-doubt-whirlwind, today I wanted to chat to you about WFH - something which we've all been thrown into in a very surreal way. And, although I do work from home part time under normal circumstances, it's no longer my habit to be home every day anymore. It's definitely thrown a curve-ball into my routine. I'm normally 'on the move' somewhere, whether that's to go to work in Manchester, to grab a coffee with friends or to get my weekly dose of Josh hugs, so it does feel odd to be... going nowhere.

"even in the chaos, you are free to bloom"

However, despite how much my routine feels jumbled, the most important thing to me right now is that I, my loved ones, my friends and the whole world around me is keeping safe. At the end of the day, we're not being asked to do much besides sit at home and pretend every day is a Saturday, right?

Working from home for me has had a slow start. I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety, a lot of tears and panic, but there are small things day-to-day which have began to help with that.

I've found that making a list helps me feel productive and gives me purpose. I mean, it's no BIG NEWS that lists help with organisation, but in a time like this, they really are a godsend. I write one each morning, including simple things like a reminder to shower, or to go outside for my hour of exercise, but unlike my normal 'WFH' days, I don't put pressure on myself to complete them entirely. At the end of the day, I think we're living in such a heightened situation right now, and the last thing I need to make myself feel bad about is not taking a picture in a top, so I'm taking things at a slower pace and letting myself enjoy the creative process rather than stressing about everything on my list being ticked off.

I've also found that a routine with meals has been helpful. Being stuck inside all day can often lead me to bad old habits of binge eating so, getting in new routine with meals has 1. helped me nip the eating disorder voices in the bud a bit and 2. helped me add structure to my days again. I think it's incredibly easy to just eat when you're feeling bored, which is completely fine, but for a lot of us out there with EDs, it can definitely be a bit of a trigger.

As well as listing making and food, simply sitting in the garden to get some work done, rather than being cooped up inside has worked wonders for me. It's such a simple thing, but having a small change of scenery besides my 4 bedroom walls is really nice. That's also another reason I think it's important to get outside for a walk or some exercise when you can. Stretching my legs, looking at the world around me (mostly trees, dogs and the elderly where I live) and getting moving just gives me that 'refresh' that I sometimes just need to keep motivated and keep working.

Most of all, WFH has given a lot of time to reflect on and contemplate my work. As I mentioned at the start, it's been nice to take the time to understand what I really enjoy creating and know what brings me that creative buzz. It's also helped me to begin opening up more again, and showing myself more over on my Instagram and here in my writing too. It feels really nice to 'set myself free', so to speak, and just be myself again, void of any comparisons.

I love being open with you guys here (and over at @hollyrebeccawhite) on my little space of the internet and I hope to continue to keep it up from now on.

All my love to you all, keep safe ♥

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