Every year we begin with the same notion 'this is going to be my year'. You let months pass by, sometimes sticking to those numerous new years resolutions, sometimes not, with fingers crossed tightly that soon that 'big break' is going to come along and that that 'thing' that's going to make this 'your year' will finally pop up. You wait it out, and then try your best, and you suddenly realise: 'shit, it's April'.

This is something that I notice a lot more now that I'm heading into my twenties. I start every year on a high, hoping that something HUGE is going to come along and make my life amazing... I'm talking, being shipped off to beautiful countries, living in my own dreamy city center flat, and not having a financial care in the world, kind of amazing. 

I see everyone else floating around, seeming to have their shit together and I get filled with this unnerving sense of 'when is that going to happen for me?'. Like a heavy weight of uncertainty has just hitched itself onto my back and won't let go.






I've recently been trying to worry less, however. (You may have read in another blog post here). It does seem to be working. I feel less stressed, I guess. A little bit 'lighter'.

Of course, it would be nice to feel settled and sure of everything already, but I'm 20 god damn it, I've got to give myself a bit of a break.

In some aspects of work, I seem to have fallen short, or at least hit a slump of sorts. Things just don't seem to be working, or at least maybe it's time to shake things up a bit. Normally that's a thought that would have me crying, head in hands, completely beside myself, yet I've just hit a point where I've began to think, 'okay, so what else is there out there for me?'.

Sure, there's not necessarily a perfect answer to that question. I'm spending a lot of my time either staring into space blankly or spurting out my ideas to any friend who will listen. But, to be honest, it feels like a good point in my life to reexamine things. I feel ready to start questioning things and working out what I want to do next to make me happy.




The thing about life is, we can't always have everything figured out - as annoying as that is. Sometimes we can swan through life, our Mondays-Sundays filled with work and exciting opportunities, and other times we can be left wondering what the fuck's going on.

Life can be a whirlpool of so many different kinds of days, emotions, people, etc. and there's always the possibility of things not going exactly how we want. Well, more than a possibility to be honest... I can't count many days where my life runs completely smoothly.

However, I no longer want to be complacent with that 'I don't know what's happening' feeling. I want to be progressing forward, even if it's at a slow pace - moving towards something that I'm entirely content with.

I want to build myself a life, not just be hovering in the same place for the rest of time.





Change can be good - that's my thought right now. Change can be good and taking the time to figure out that 'change' is proving to be pretty beneficial for my life and my way of thinking. I go through so many 'ruts' where I just don't feel good enough, but I need to remember that each day is a new day, full of new ideas and new opportunities, and I just need to take it as it comes, putting it together piece by piece.

Shop the post:

I've always been one for a simple outfit, you know a good ol' bit of denim and a baggy tee - you can't go wrong with a basic look to build your outfit off. However, lately I've lost my love for jeans. I just can't seem to find a pair that make me feel 'good' anymore. I mean of course I still have a staple pair or two in my wardrobe - some days just call for jeans and a jumper, of course... but I've found myself grabbing more for my dresses and, most of all, trousers, to complete my looks.





I've been hunting for a pair of jeans that I feel confident in for ages now. From shop to shop I've been in and out of the fitting rooms, trying to nab a pair that I tried on and just thought 'yes, this is the pair!', but it just never happened.

Over time I began to build a collection of trousers - from culottes to palazzo and vintage style suit trousers, I've developed a love affair with a piece of clothing and I don't think I'll be looking back anytime soon.

Trousers just have this effect that make me feel put together and classic. I feel strong and powerful in them - a way that jeans just stopped making me feel.

Especially with my building collection of blazers and long coats, trousers have slotted perfectly into my day-to-day style and I always find trousers fit me much more flattering than any of the jeans I've had my eye on right now.





Don't get me wrong, I'm not swearing off those denim leg warmers forever, but I'm definitely growing fond of styling trousers with anything and everything right now.

Maybe I'll eventually find a pair of jeans that make me feel incredible again, but right now, I'm sworn to styling up any beautiful trousers I can get my hands on.

I've included some of my favorites, as well as some I've got my eye on, below for you... just in case you want to jump on my weird anti-jean bandwagon too!

It's no surprise that when I spotted this blazer in TK Maxx the other day, I had to have it. My bedroom is filled with this gorgeous mustard shade - it's the perfect thing for a 'sort-of' minimalist gal like me who also likes a pop of colour every now and again. It works perfectly with neutral tones but, equally, adds a bit of something extra to a look (or room), which I love.

I've been seeing this colour everywhere lately, and I'm definitely not mad about it. I think yellow, and not just this wonderful mustard shade specifically, is the most beautiful colour for Spring. It's reflective of daffodils and sunshine, and it's just a lovely happy tone to have added to your wardrobe at this time of year.

At the end of the day, it's always been a colour I've been drawn to. I adore the contrast with my ginger hair and especially love pairing it with a red lip - it just screams 'Marc Jacobs - Daisy' to me!





Lately, I've been conscious about adding more colour to my wardrobe, simply because I found that I always grab for my more simple stuff - like your blacks, beiges and whites - hence the mass overhaul of my looks this year. I've finally found a simple style I can build upon. However, I don't want that to stop me from adding a splash of colour here and there, particularly with Summer only just around the corner.

Wearing one statement colour in your look is always fun and means your look is that little bit more eye-catching too. It's a failsafe way to exaggerate the colours you love, without it being way out of your style comfort zone.

This mustard shade is a perfect place to start if you're a bit of a beige-hoarder like me. It's still got that warm tone too it, pairs lovely with all the colours in my basic wardrobe, yet still gives an outfit that striking feel.





I'm yet to fill my wardrobe back up with bright colours and clashing patterns, because I just don't think that would be practical for me (or my bank account), but this blazer was a good place for me to start. Wearing it with what is already in my collection is super easy - it contrasts so nicely with a little black dress and boots but also looks great with a white tee and jeans - I can't go wrong!

So if you're like me, and a little bit nervous to be whipping out the bold colours, or even pastels, into your very simplistic wardrobe, then find one statement piece/colour and run with it for a bit. It'll be that little confidence boost you need to get ready for Spring/Summer styling!

I've spent so many nights sat worrying, crying, stressing over the idea of work... or the idea of lack-of-work to be specific. As freelancers, we all go through dry spells, there's no doubt about that. It's hard to know where your next bit of money is coming from, when it's coming or if you're even going to get paid on time. It's not easy to live your life around that uncertainty.

I know a lot of you may know what I mean. Whether you're a blogger, model, writer, PR, Photographer, MUA or whatever you do, we all go through it. It's those days, weeks and months where the emails just seems to vanish from our inboxes, the money starts to minimize and you're left wondering what you're doing wrong?! WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?!

*Que anxiety*

Well, I think I've exhausted myself with it all; with the overthinking, the crying of rivers and the working myself up over and over again. I'm not sure I even have an ounce of energy to do the panicking thing anymore.

With that being said, and with a few comforting words from those nearest and dearest, I've decided to just give myself a break. Like a mental spa vacation, if you will.





My mental health has been effected due to this idea of what I'm doing not being 'good enough'. It's hard to swan through life without comparing yourself, wondering "oh shit, she's doing a campaign with them!" "but they didn't contact me?!" "why am I not getting anything?".

Don't get me wrong, when I see someone doing an 'AD' or shooting a campaign, I'm always sat behind my phone screen thinking "yaaaas queen, get those moneys!". But it can't help but feel disheartening when you're lacking that kind of thing yourself.

At the end of the day, I love what I'm producing right now. I'm proud of it all. I love how my content has grown and how I've found my way this year. It's been a big confidence boost for me. But, I have been letting this one small incentive ruin the enjoyment I get from creating content or working in the first place.

Okay, of course it's nice to be earning regular money and be able to splash out on the things you want, but its also just nice to appreciate that you're doing the best you can, doing all you can do, and that's enough.





I've spent the past few weeks just living, just floating around, not worrying over 'why this isn't happening?!' or 'this?!', I'm just letting myself take it easy.

I work damn hard on what I produce and I know that it's paying off, and that feels wonderful. So, this extra pressure that I seemed to be adding to myself all the time, isn't needed.

I'm not just a 'blogger' or 'model' or however I should label myself, I'm also a person with a lot going on behind the camera lens, and I need to prioritize that when I get the time to.

Sometimes it's good to take a much needed step back and just let yourself live peacefully without the over analysis.





I adore my jobs and I wouldn't change them for the world right now, yet it has been so important for me to think more about myself recently, and not just about where I'll be shooting my next outfit photo or when my next trip to London will be.

Its better to throw myself back into the work, when it shows it's face, with a clearer head and less-down-beaten attitude, than it is to go in there filled entirely with stress from head to toe.

Take time for you and figure yourself out first - that's what I'm going with.

Well hello hello hello, how are we all doing?

I thought I'd take a bit of time today to just sit down, write and have a good ol' catch up with you guys, filling you in on my life. 

I feel like I've been running round like a maniac lately, like a total busy bee, so it feels nice to tell you about what I've been up to (still, it's pretty mundane, but I'll tell you anyway)!




So, first things first, as I'm sure you've noticed, Hayleigh and I have been working together weekly to help each other with shooting content, planning outfits and just generally discussing work - and to be honest with you, it's been the dreamiest partnership.

It's wonderful to work with like-minded people, but it's also great because I just adore Hayleigh anyway. We get along and get the job done, so it's perfect!

It's been a massive help for me and I've been loving the content I've been producing - I hope you have too. It's just been great to know that if I'm lacking stuff to share with you guys, I will definitely have something done within the next few days - it takes away a little bit of the stress, which is great and certainly needed!





I've been an absolute roadie the past few weeks, going to see Josh and his band, Good Future, perform several gigs in Manchester.

Now, I'm no music/gig expert, but I've been really enjoying learning more about the whole thing (soon you'll find me in the background playing the tambourine). Plus, I just really love going to watch them. They're such a talented bunch of guys and I get very proud watching them (as I'm sure you can tell from the copious amounts of Instagram stories I share).

You can have a listen to them HERE.




Last of all, I've been writing a lot more lately. I've got so much swirling around in my head at the moment, that getting to sit down and focus on some writing for a bit has really helped.

Whether it's poetry or a blog post, writing helps empty my thoughts out a bit.

I've always found that though - whenever my brain is feeling too full-up of thoughts, that's when I'm most eager to write!

Let me know if there's anything you'd like me to cover soon, I'm always looking for a little inspiration!

Something I promised myself this year is that I would read more... having said that, I've only managed to read 1 within the past two months *doh*. However, it hasn't slipped my mind that I need to up my reading game and I have a stack of books waiting for me to open my eyes to them.

I'd love to hear your suggestions on what books I should read - I love a book that I can get lost in on my 2 hour train journeys in and out of London, so if you've read something recently that you love, let me know!




1. Fearne Cotton 'Quiet'

I had Fearne's other book, 'Happy: The Journal', last year and it was honestly a massive help for my mental health. I loved opening it up every morning and jotting down my thoughts for the day. It was a refreshing start for me and always helped to clear my head.

For Christmas, my Mum, again, got me another of Fearne's books, this time it was 'Quiet' - I hand't heard much about it, but if we're going off the last book of hers, I am definitely going to like it.

It's apparently a book that helps "tame that bad inner voice" and lets us unleash our "confidence, courage, beauty, wisdom and belief" through the idea of a little quietness.




2. The Slumflower 'What A Time To Be Alone'

I began reading this book a little bit, however completely flaked on it like the lazy reader I am. I am for sure going to restart it though, as all I hear is people raving over it!

It's a book all about self-worth and, as the amazing "online sensation" she is, The Slumflower becomes your "life guru" and helps to show you how being alone is perfectly good for the soul.

This is something I definitely need - I've become very dependant recently and lost a little of my love for my own space and alone time. Hopefully this will reignite my independence a little bit!




3. Rupi Kaur 'The Sun and Her Flowers'

You all probably know I'm a bit lover of poetry. I love reading snippets of people's thoughts, laced into beautiful words and pasted simply on a page. There's just nothing that pulls at my emotions like it.

I adored Rupi's first book 'Milk & Honey', and couldn't wait to read her second. I bought this book a while back, but ended up losing it (probably in the streets of Manchester somewhere *cry*), however, my lovely boyfriend, Josh, got me another copy for Christmas, so I'm going to finally be able to finish it *woohoo*!

For those of you who don't know, this book is meant to be a "journey of wilting, falling, rooting, rising and blooming. It's a celebration of love in all it's forms".

After the year I had last year, this is definitely a book that I can relate to, and what better to heal my soul than a good bit of poetry, am I right?