"This is the beginning of anything you want"
Life sometimes places you on the edge of a building; it's high up, so high that the people below you looks like tiny little ants, swarming, moving around; and it asks you to jump off. Do you jump?
Your brain, your natural instinct, is screaming 'no, this is a terrible idea!' and you're clamping your feet into the ground, cementing yourself in one place. On the other hand, your heart is pushing you off the edge. Your heart convinces you that you've grown wings (much like drinking a can of Red Bull, I guess (#notspon)) and that you can fly.
Do you listen to your head or your heart?
I used to listen to my head a lot.
I used to listen to the overthinking, the over-analyzing, and the constant anxiety that just hooks itself onto the back of my mind like a leach.
I used to think about every possible thing that could go wrong in every situation, and it would mean that I would overthink things so much that I would convince myself out of doing things or seeing people. It would scare me, and freak me out so badly, that I'd avoid most situations altogether.
And, seriously, don't get me wrong, I still listen to those thoughts now. I still sometimes succumb to the anxieties, the worries and the fears, but, at the end of the day, we all get scared, we all have things that we worry about and it's hard for that to not get in the way sometimes, and that's totally okay.
Despite sometimes giving into the craziness going on in my head, nowadays, I'm a big believer in pushing myself. I'm a big believer in 'grab every opportunity that you can'. If an opportunity comes my way, I'm going to take it (even if it means I need to grow some metaphorical Red Bull wings to help me get there lol).
I've started to ignore all of the worry and the fears as much as I possibly can, and I've just began focusing on the good things, the more positive aspects and the amazing things that could come from these 'daunting' opportunities that I would have initially turned down in the past.
And, do you know what? It's meant that I've had the most incredible year ever.
And, then in terms of modelling too, I've been working my absolute arse off.
I've been travelling multiple days a week, shooting constantly, and booking jobs with brands I never thought in a million years I would be working with. I've really motivated myself to make the most of it and it's really starting to pay off, which is so incredibly exciting.
I've basically gone from being terrified of London and the opportunities that faced me, to taking London somewhat by storm and grabbing at every opportunity I can. And, I don't think I need to tell you that, the latter has left me in a much happier place.
Sure, there are times when you really do just have to let your anxieties win.
If you're so sick and so worried over a situation that it's causing you serious harm, then it probably not worth it. But, if it's something that you're umming and ahhing over, simply because you're scared of the tube or you don't know your way around an area, then that's when you should consider saying to yourself, 'do you know what? fuck it! let's go!' and just absolutely running with it.
So, I guess the question I'm going to leave you with is, do you listen to your head or your heart?
Do you jump, spread your wings, and fly? (lol, how cliche) or do you stay in one place, standing on the edge, watching the world move around below you?
Maybe you listen to both for now.
Maybe you start by dangling a foot off the edge of the building rather than throwing yourself off into the distance, or you could just completely go for it, soar off, dive head first, and start experiencing it all right here, right now. But, either way, don't cement yourself in one place, don't stop yourself from living the way you want to live.
We have to allow ourselves to grow, take opportunities and explore what life is giving us.
I can't wait to fill you all in on what life has thrown my way this year. It's full up of 'flying' moments haha ♥
Shop the look:
Honestly, thank you for this post.
ReplyDeleteI've been listening to my head all year. I dropped out of college after only 2 months and was/have been absorbed in anxiety/depression all year, PRAYING for the courage to get myself to start making the life i fantasize in my head real. I've definitely been trying to have this conversation, as you presented in this post, to myself.
I've been invited to different states to visit friends this upcoming fall, and trying to find my college mojo back again to give that a second shot. I'm trying to let myself soar with life and all it's wonders instead of being defeated by them.
Basically, thank you for this post. It feels so good to know that someone else goes through the same thing as me. Wishing you the best my love xx ❤️
Loved this post so much Holly! I used to worry about so much and now I just take things as they come and push myself each day to grab each opportunity by the hand when it arises! 🙌🏻 ♥️ Xx
ReplyDeleteSo glad to hear that you've been grabbing every opportunity and it's been paying off. I definitely think you've got the right idea there. And you look so gorgeous in these photos by the way!
ReplyDeleteSamio xxx
http://www.samio.co.uk/